My players are on a quest to retrieve and reforge seals that will keep an ancient evil in its prison. They were sailing to the jungle in order to retrieve the next seal, when, for a bit of levity and a potential side quest, I had their ship attacked by goblin pirates. The following is what happened because no DM can think of everything…
Wizard: When the ship gets in range I’m going to Shadow Step into the Black Powder room of the Pirate ship.
DM (Me): Well you have no knowledge of ship building so you end up in the captain’s quarters.
Wizard: Let me check the quarters for a schematic (passes DC).
DM: You find a schematic for the ship.
Wizard: Shadow Step again (she has it memorized multiple times, and has it quickened as well in a pearl of power).
DM: (After rolling some percentile dice) You find the powder room empty, with one open barrel of of powder.
Wizard: I’m going to cast spark on the barrel and quicken shadow step to get back to my ship.
I have her roll a percentile die to see just what happens when she does this.
DM: As the back of the Pirate ship blows up, the rest of the party sees Liilian shoot out of the shadows cast by the captain’s cabin, singed, smoking, and near death. Her flight stop abruptly as she slams into the main mast and slither into a crumpled heap on the deck. The Pirate ship is quickly sinking off the port side of your ship.
Paladin: I rush over to her and cast lay on hands. She’s healed for 48 hps (back to full health)
Alchemist: I’m standing, staring in awe at the beautiful carnage.
DM: (OOC) Well fuck all, there goes the next few sessions I had planned. You suck. It was brilliant and all, but you suck.